Is Your Life by Design? By Bonita Surges, Transformation Life Coach and President, Merkaba Coaching
Have you noticed there is so much pain, stress, and conflict everywhere we look these days? How can we change it? I believe we change it by making sure we individually exercise authentic self-leadership and work toward achieving self-mastery. When we do, we experience a joyful life and the ripple effect impacts everyone around us.
I believe every individual has a unique contribution to make to the planet; every individual is a unique piece of the humanity puzzle. When attempting to be someone other than one’s authentic self, a person leaves the puzzle fragmented. People start looking at others as the “reason” they are so unhappy or the "cause" of the conflict. We need for each person to shine authentically. My own journey has been quite the trip!
What is self-leadership? Self-leadership exists when we are living life as our authentic selves, when we are living life deliberately rather than simply reacting to circumstances and other people. Stephen R. Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People was a powerful experience for me in my self-mastery journey. Among many other things, it taught me about being proactive - consciously choosing my response to people and circumstances. That led me to recognize I needed to know who I was to consciously choose. I've come to learn that one of the most valuable steps we can take toward self-mastery is deeply knowing who we authentically are. Not who we are supposed to be, or who we’ve become through our reactions to life's experiences. When we are exercising self-leadership and we encounter internal or external conflict, instead of looking at others or outside ourselves for the "cause," we stop and look in the mirror to see the growth opportunity, the opportunity for greater self-mastery.
Human Design is an assessment that provides an energy template for clearly identifying your authentic self - it never changes. Based on birth information, it identifies strengths and vulnerabilities. It identifies the areas of inner conundrums, inner conflicts. It shines a light on the magnificence of a person’s uniqueness. It helps us recognize our authentic self as the person we were designed to express in this lifetime.
Self-mastery is a life-long process and is evidenced by the degree to which our life contains more joy than pain. Karen Curry Parker of Quantum Alignment Systems, LLC has said “The greatest source of pain in anyone’s life is the degree to which their life is misaligned with their authentic self.” I believe that is true. When you are living your life in self-mastery, your life is by your own design and not mere reactions to circumstances. You know and honor your authentic self. You successfully reconcile conflicts internally as well as externally. You are a stronger and more effective leader of yourself and others. You genuinely shine.
A joyful life does not mean without challenges! It takes courage and perseverance to embark upon the journey to self-mastery. Are you up for it?